Earlier this month, my husband and I celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary, and we marked the occasion with our first dinner alone since our baby girl was born.
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On several occasions over the last month, I’ve spent time with good friends, caught up with old friends, and even made some new friends. And it’s been great. But last night, I had to say so long to two friends I’ve come to know and love over the last two years. They were our pew buddies the very first time my husband took me to visit our current church. And honestly, a big part of what helped me make the decision to go back again. We were young married couples in the same phase of life, and their sweet spirits were good for my soul.
Growing up, I just wanted to be beautiful, and live a life where people would constantly tell me I was beautiful. And to do that, I thought I needed the perfect full makeup routine, the perfect closed mouth smirk, and the trendiest clothes. I was constantly changing myself into what I thought was good enough to be beautiful.
Night after night I find myself awake well after midnight. My daughter is asleep in her room and my husband is out cold on some sofa somewhere in the house. Meanwhile, I’m typing away on my keyboard with the crickets outside my window keeping me company; and the thrill of being alone with my thoughts keeping me awake.